11/10/2008

YOU'RE STUPID!

This is one of those "I can't believe it happened to me" stories...

Sunday afternoon, I was walking Laverne & Carmine around the neighborhood when an Asian lady crossed the street with a big smile across her face while looking at the dogs. The following is a word-for-word documentation of our conversation:

LADY - Are they twins?
GIO - No, they are brother and sister!
LADY - Really? Same Age?
GIO - No, she's 1.9 months, he's 9 months
LADY - What are their names?
GIO - She's Laverne, he's Carmine
LADY - (the lady stops walking and shakes her head) Stupid.
GIO - Excuse me?
LADY - I guess they have a stupid last name too, like Higgenbottom or something?
GIO - (Deciding to take the high road) You're stupid.
LADY - I'm sorry?
GIO - You should be. You're stupid. Carry on. (shooing her off with my free hand)
LADY - (looking shocked) Well, I never (and storms off)!
GIO - (calling after her) Have a nice day!

Can you believe that??? She actually has the gall to stand there in front of a guy who is about 125 lbs. heavier and at least a foot taller and call his dogs stupid? What is the world coming too? I wish I had a camera though to show you her expression when I called her "stupid" it was priceless. Imagine someone handing you a pile of cash only to pull it away just before you grab it while shoving a hot poker up your ass... that's kind of like her expression. I couldn't believe she actually said that the dogs had stupid names and I can't believe I called her stupid right afterwards and then told her to "carry on" while "shooing" her away. I actually "shooed" her away. I felt bad for 0.0 seconds and then felt great for the rest of the day.

She's probably telling the world that some bald fat guy with two pitbulls was rude to her or something. Gotta love our world!

5 comments:

BEADLE said...

Way to go man ! Some people are completely oblivious to how rude they are. That woman is totally stupid and I bet her name is stupid too.

your pal,
Beadle

Kim said...

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAAAAAA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAAAAAAH HA HA HA HA HA HA!

I love you Gio :D

LOBOT said...

Wow...that explains why I've never met any Asian people named Carmine or Laverne...

LOBOT said...

You might've had better luck with Jackson or Penny.

Unknown said...

OMG... THAT IS THE BEST STORY EVER!
I still can't stop laughing...

Stupid lady, I hope a bird pooed on her on her way back to the home...